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Reviews
The Navy Way (1944)
Don't Make Waves, Marry One
I'm from Minnesota, so I can attest that the character Johnny Jersey in The Navy Way is an accurate portrayal of someone from St. Paul. They think the whole world revolves around them. They cause nothing but trouble in any group setting. Johnny Jersey was lucky they didn't hang him from the yardarm. Undoubtedly he would have screamed: "I'm from St. Paul, you can't do this to me!"
Interestingly, St. Paul has way more people of Irish heritage than Italian. So I guess The Navy Way should be commended for having stereotypical Italian-Americans instead of the more expected stereotypical Irish-Americans.
Also, as someone who lives on one of the Great Lakes, it was refreshing to see a film set on the Great Lakes. I did think it was strange that the Navy had its recruits go out in boats without life jackets. I wouldn't think that was the Navy way.
The Fugitive (1993)
How Many Editors Does It Take To Edit A Fugitive Movie?
Six. That's the same amount of editors it takes to screw in a light bulb by the way.
Coincidence? Maybe. Maybe not.
Kimble gets some clothes from a hospital patient. The patient is named "Mr. Johnson." A "Dr. Johnson" is paged at one of the hospitals. Did you know the one armed man's name in the TV show was named Fred Johnson?
Coincidence? Maybe. Maybe not.
Spinal Tap couldn't find their way to the stage and the U. S. Marshals had trouble getting out of the dam.
Coincidence? Maybe. Maybe not.
Tommy Lee Jones wasn't as obsessed in capturing The Fugitive as his TV counter part played by Barry Morse. That's why they changed his name from Philip to Sam. Actually, I don't know why they changed his name other than I guess Tommy Lee doesn't seem like a Philip.
I liked The Fugitive when it came out because I was 30 years old. I wish I was still 30 years old. 30 is a good age. I bet Harrison Ford wished he was 30 when he had to jump off the dam. He still managed to survive which was good, otherwise the movie would have had an abrupt ending.
Die letzte Chance (1945)
Don't Look Now, But Here Comes The Nazi Ski Patrol
I am a sucker for man on the run, or in this case, people on the run movies. Even the most lackluster production will have a certain amount of tension hanging over every scene. The Last Chance is a well structured story with plenty of obstacles for our protagonists to overcome as a collection of allied soldiers and refugees try to make their way out of war time Italy to Switzerland. And they have to do it without Frank Sinatra.
Director Leopold Lindtberg really knew how to block out scenes and compose compelling shots. The Last Chance is consistently visually rewarding. Plus, Lindtberg coaxed decent performances out of some of the non professional actors.
Branded: Very Few Heroes (1965)
Too Tall To Kiss
First off, Kathryn Hays can shoot my pistol anytime. Chuck gets to run off with her at the end of the Branded episode Very Few Heroes Are Sandwiches. I assumed the two of them made a bee line for the nearest haystack to roll around in.
Second off, I always wonder if every western town has a tar and feather committee. And is there one guy in charge of tar and another guy in charge of feathers? It seems a lot to ask one person to have a ready supply of both tar and feathers. And are the people who supply the tar and feathers compensated for supplying them?
Anyway, I'm glad Chuck managed to elude the tar and feather treatment even though everyone still thinks he's yellow.
The Woman on the Beach (1947)
Coast Guard Movie With A Horse In It
Robert Ryan plays a coast guard guy who rides a horse on a foggy beach looking for a plot. He finds Joan Bennett hoping she might have one. She's married to Charles Bickford who plays a painter named "Tod" (spelled with one "d"). Tod is blind and no longer paints. He isn't happy about being blind and not painting. A lot of his pain and anger is directed at Joan who seems to be responsible for Tod's vision deficiencies.
Robert Ryan thinks he has found a plot, so he dumps his fiancé, but keeps his horse. Instead of finding a plot, he has instead gotten mixed up with a dysfunctional couple. He does nothing to ease their dysfunction. He actually makes it worse. The only thing to do is to abruptly end the movie with a structural fire and send the French director packing. A.
Manhattan (1979)
Begs For A Remake
For the remake, I'm thinking change the setting. Most people can't relate to Manhattan. Have the movie be set in Des Moines. The Woody Allen character could give up his insurance job to be a full time YouTuber. He could share his funny observations about living the urban lifestyle in Des Moines. Oh, and the movie should be shot in color. Black and white is too depressing. The corn fields surrounding Des Moines would look stunning in color.
His buddy could be a professor of modern agriculture. The professor would only think of having an affair with the Diane Keaton character because people don't have affairs in Iowa, they just think about having them. Woody's underaged girl friend would instead be at least 21 years old and a college student. She would be of mixed race - Norwegian and German to reflect the diversity of today's America. Woody's character would be an obsessive fan of John Wayne films and not Ingmar Bergman. Finally, instead of Gershwin, the soundtrack would feature Meredith Wilson tunes from The Music Man.
Hidalgo (2004)
The Horse Does Everything But Talk
I thought Peter O'Toole might show up on a camel at some point, but he didn't. And then at the end I thought Jane Fonda and Robert Redford would show up to assist in setting Hidalgo free, but they didn't.
I do like movies with horses, as well as TV shows with talking horses. In real life men don't seem to be into horses anymore other than to do some occasional bronco busting. Nowadays men leave the horse appreciation to the women folk. I'm not sure why.
I found Hidalgo to be one of those modern Hollywood productions done well enough for me not to hate, but a little too slick and predictable for me to love.
Smashing Time (1967)
TOMORROW Never Knows or It's All TOO MUCH
The recording session for the song "While I'm Still Young" is worth the price of admission. Funny satirical stuff going on there. Brilliantly executed. Couldn't stop laughing during that scene.
Although we get to see them be on the receiving end of tossed pies, it's a shame we don't get to see Tomorrow perform a tune or two in Smashing Time. Chalk that one up to missed opportunity. Otherwise, I enjoyed the goofy antics of our clueless heroines. I was happy they were able to survive fleeting pop superstardom and return to their humble roots in northern England. Too bad more pop superstars can't be that lucky.
The Filthy Thirteen (2019)
The Battling Dingbats Of D-Day
The filthy thirteen are so filthy most of them get knocked off by a lone Nazi sniper (who looked old enough to be a veteran of the Great War) after landing behind enemy lines in Normandy on D-Day (during broad daylight no less - a little late to "surprise" the enemy fellas).
Their skill and training as elite soldiers was shown to be quite impressive. When under enemy fire from the barely concealed Nazi sniper in the tree, they swear a lot. Is there a better way to show how bad ass the filthy thirteen are than to have them use vulgar language? Okay, in a later scene, we do get to see them shoot a Nazi in the nuts. That was pretty filthy.
It seemed like the audio for most of the interior scenes was coming from the camera mic. Did the person working the boom mic walk out early on in the production? Or maybe one of the filthy thirteen accidentally shot them.
I think this is the only WW 2 film I have watched where I was cheering for the Nazis.
Quiz Show (1994)
Herbie Goes Bananas!
John Turturro is really good in Quiz Show. I had forgotten how colorful his performance was since last seeing the movie 30 years ago. He's brilliant at playing manic.
The guy playing the sponsor was good too. His New York accent sounded very authentic. I haven't seen him in many movies. According to the IMDB he has directed a lot more films than he has acted in.
It's interesting how in the 1950s congress was always investigating things. If they thought you weren't American enough, they would investigate you. For some reason they never investigated professional wrestling. I've always had this nagging suspicion that wrestling is rigged. I'd like to see a movie about that sometime.
One of Our Aircraft Is Missing (1942)
What Did You Do In The War, Daddy? I Dressed In Dutch Drag.
There's a scene in One Of Our Aircraft Is Missing where a not-American-football game is being played. The British Airmen, who were forced to bail out of their aircraft, are watching the match with the Dutch citizens who are helping them get back to England.
It sure looked like the grass on the pitch was long - really long. Even Johan Cruyff would have had trouble dribbling. It made me wonder if the Nazis had some kind of policy in the occupied countries against maintaining soccer fields. Cutting the pitch grass is strictly verboten!!!
When the crewmen landed they almost all managed to stick together. They were separated from their comrade who was not too bright, but a great footballer. Nice touch to have him show up playing soccer (in the tall grass).
The film was definitely a product of war time propaganda (which I generally find fascinating). It seemed more restrained in this department compared to many of its Hollywood counterparts.
The Crooked Way (1949)
Calling Dr. Kimble
Ellen Drew's character bugged me in The Crooked Way. I thought the drapes in her apartment were way too fussy. I perhaps judge people unfairly based on their window treatments. I should feel sorry for her because she was married to a jerk. And then the jerk shows up again, only he's no longer a jerk because he was in combat during WW 2. The jerk doesn't even remember being a jerk. He discovers he had an Italian last name, which can only mean two things: He I was either a gangster or a waiter in a pizza restaurant.
The jerk who couldn't remember his past was played by John Payne. Even though he used to be a gangster and a jerk, I was worried about John Payne's character. He was walking around with shrapnel in his brain and he proceeded to get beat up so many times during the course of the movie that I lost count. I am pretty sure the repeated hits on his noggin' will cause PTSD later on life.
I'm a cat guy, so I hope John Payne and Ellen Drew adopted Percy Helton's cat. And then I would hope the cat clawed Ellen's fussy drapes to shreds cause I like happy endings.
Up the Junction (1968)
Poor Little Rich Girl
My favorite scene in Up The Junction was when Polly bought a banana and ate it (although I did wonder if it was necessary for the merchant to bag the banana - seemed wasteful).
I buy my bananas in bunches, but I suppose if you're a factory girl and are on a budget, you can only afford to buy single bananas.
Apparently in England some people are posh and others aren't. If you're posh and try to date a non-posh person, it probably won't work out even if you are trying not to be posh.
My second favorite scene was when the women poured the rotten tasting tea down the sink. I've seen movies with abortions, I've seen movies with motorcycle crashes, but I have never seen a movie where tea is dumped in the toilet.
Quatermass 2 (1957)
Don't Worry, They'll Be Back
The main problem with Quatermass 2 is that the aliens don't seem to know they are supposed to start their take over of Earth in the U. S. A. - the home of the brave, the land of the free and ground zero for pervasive paranoia. Maybe the aliens didn't want to compete with giant spiders or whatever other science fiction critters were romping around in the states during the 1950s.
The Brits always act so fussy and mannered. Can't have any of that with the world in peril, so bring in a no nonsense yank to save the day! Smart move.
I was glad synthetic food wasn't being made at a petroleum plant. Processed foods aren't supposed to be good for you.
I like movies with lots of machine guns in them, so I enjoyed Quatermass 2.
Framed (1947)
Check Your Brakes
Glenn Ford drives a truck with bad brakes at the beginning of "Framed." It's a great way to start a movie.
He crashes into Edgar Buchanan's beater of a truck. He tells Edgar it's not his fault, but the fault of the trucking company who are apparently indifferent to maintaining the brakes on their fleet of trucks. It's too bad Glenn didn't crash into an AA meeting because it is subsequently revealed that Glenn has a troubled relationship with alcohol. When not over consuming alcohol or driving trucks with bad breaks, Glenn works in the exploiting the Earth's resources Industry - aka mining. Currently unemployed, he catches the eye of waitress Janis Carter at a local bar. She's a hottie, but watch out Glenn because Janis is a text book example of a Femme Fatale! She is just as adept at serving up cold brews as she is at cold cocking a dude with a wrench. It became clear that after WW 2, dames couldn't be trusted. And Janis definitely can't be trusted. She's all about the money. She wants lots of it, so she can fill her closet with monogrammed bath robes.
Based on the title of the film, I thought Glenn Ford would be framed at some point during the narrative. Turns out it's Edgar Buchanan who ends up wrongly accused. I felt sorry for him because all he wanted to do was get a bank loan so he could mine for minerals.
The movie ends happily enough even though we don't get to see Janis strapped to the electric chair or Edgar get his bank loan or Glenn check into the Betty Ford clinic.
The Unsuspected (1947)
Old Time Radio Version Of The Shock Jock
I had to look at the plot synopsis on Wikipedia for The Unsuspected while watching the movie. I was confused as to how Claude Raines managed to surround himself with good lookin' dames and then seemed intent on knocking them off.
It was for money, always for money. Plus, I think he got a kick out plotting and executing all the deaths. He appeared to have more fun doing it than doing his day job.
He lived in a cool house. Very atmospheric. It was located up in the hills making it suitable for disabling the brakes of an automobile. You ever notice how in the movies whenever automotive brakes are rendered useless, the driver of the brake less vehicle always ends up going down long curvy roads?
I like the idea of forgetting you got married. I bet a lot of married people watching The Unsuspected found that part of the plot very appealing.
Doomsday Machine (1976)
Keep Reaching For The Stars
Doomsday Machine challenges the conventional stylistic and narrative conventions of the typical Hollywood production and is ultimately an artistic triumph of sublime, subversive and often subtle experimental filmmaking.
For example, the hypocrisy of continuity in mainstream movies is relentlessly exposed as a cliched contrivance. The lack of continuity in Doomsday Machine forces a more dynamic and less passive cinematic experience. Having been conditioned and indoctrinated by consistent continuity, bourgeois audiences will undoubtedly feel liberated by the haphazard continuity so brilliantly deployed in the movie.
The conclusion of Doomsday Machine also mocks the often obvious and stereotypical endings of most Hollywood productions. Do endings really need to be coherent and make sense? After all, life is often confusing and vague, so why shouldn't movies be that way too?
My main takeaway from Doomsday Machine was this: If I'm going to be lost in space, it might as well be with Ruta Lee.
Slap Shot (1977)
The House Of Newman
The best hockey movie ever made (and should never be remade) is Slap Shot. The second best hockey movie ever made is The Boy Who Drank Too Much starring Lance Kerwin and Scott Baio. The third best hockey movie ever made is Miracle On Ice starring Karl Malden and Steve Guttenberg.
I grew up in Minnesota. There was an affluent neighborhood in my hometown and rumor had it Paul Newman owned a house in it.
It was 1978 and I was in junior high school when I first heard the rumor. As a 15 year old I found the rumor to be credible.
In Slap Shot, Reggie, the character played by Newman, is off to (the state of hockey) Minnesota at the end of the film. If the fictional Reggie was going to the land of 10,000 hockey rinks, why wouldn't Newman go there too? Minnesota native and film director George Roy Hill probably helped him pick out the house. I bet even the guys who played the Hanson brothers, who also hailed from Minnesota, went house hunting with Newman. Newman hadn't worked with the Cohen brothers yet, otherwise I'm sure they would have offered some real estate advice too.
Newman had done some auto racing at the Brainerd International Raceway, so that was another reason why he would want a house in Minnesota.
Apparently over the years a lot of people heard about Paul Newman's house and would knock on the door hoping to say "Howdy" to Paul.
As it turned out Paul didn't own or live in the house. The people who did live in the "Newman" house got tired of being bothered. They tracked down Paul at a racetrack and asked him to hold a sign they made. The plan was to take a photo of Paul with the sign and then they would turn the photo into a poster placing it in front of their home.
Paul graciously agreed to have his photo taken with the sign. I saw the photo and read the story about the house Paul Newman didn't own in the local newspaper. In the photo Paul has a big grin on his face and the sign says: I DON'T LIVE HERE.
Every time I watch Slap Shot or buy a jar of Paul's spaghetti sauce, I think of the house he didn't live in.
High School Confidential! (1958)
Dark Period In American History
The 1950s was the decade that America started to decline. Teenagers embraced Rock and Roll (a musical genre conceived by the Soviet Union to weaken the moral fabric of the country). Teens also began taking illegal drugs (a practice once exclusive to jazz musicians and Robert Mitchum) and driving vehicles at excessive speeds. Even pool parties reflected the unraveling of an orderly nation with the kids jumping off diving boards in a reckless manner. Plus, there was a lack of proper adult supervision at the pool parties. Even more disturbing was the improper use of the English language for purposes of communication. Teen slang was incomprehensible to everyone except teens.
In High School Confidential we see law enforcement going to great lengths to curb teen drug use. Surely if the drugs are eliminated the kids will stop listening to rock music and digging beat poetry. Surely they will drop the crazy jargon that saturates their dialogue and speak genuine English.
Thankfully sex, drugs and rock & roll are remnants of a decadent past, as once again America is righteous and pure in spirit. But if you want to see how lacking in virtue America once was, watch High School Confidential.
The Quatermass Xperiment (1955)
Personal Feelings Have No Place In Science
The beginning of The Quatermass Xperiment has a young couple's farm field tryst rudely interrupted by a rocket ship's abrupt return to Earth. They have to save a roll in the hay for another day.
I like how the scene is executed without the audience ever seeing the rocket ship until post crash.
Unless the rocket featured airbags, I am pretty sure the crew would be dead. But one of them is still alive, while the others are missing!
The Quatermass Xperiment clips along nicely until we get a monster on the brink of taking over the world hanging from the rafters of Westminster Abbey.
But Mr. Quatermass as played by Brian Donlevy is really the true monster in the film. He's a science first, ask questions later kind of guy, and in SF flicks, that's about as scary as they come.
Third Party Risk (1954)
Burning Bridges
Lloyd Bridges plays a character who likes to record music featuring castanets on a reel to reel in The Deadly Game. While in Spain - the castanets capital of the world - he meets an old war buddy (Tony) who runs a successful photography/blackmail/industrial espionage business. Tony's occupation isn't without its risks and he ends up dead after stealing some kind of formula from Big Pharma.
I'm not sure if I got the plot right but it doesn't really matter because we know Lloyd, with the help of local law enforcement, will catch the bad guys and end up with the cute brunette.
Lloyd gets knocked out early on the film. Having the hero get conked on the noggin' seems to be an on going theme in these Lippert/Hammer productions. It's my understanding that Lippert (an American) insisted on having an American play the lead in their joint ventures. Hammer must have said: "Okay fine, as long as they get hit on the head in each film."
Five Days (1954)
Killing Me Softly
I like how the killer tried three different methods to try and knock off Dane Clark in Paid To Kill. First, he tried a gun. Well, that didn't work, so then he attempted hit and run. Missed! How about a bomb in a desk drawer? Despite a decent blast, Dane and his ever devoted secretary escaped unscathed. I wonder if their hearing wouldn't have been compromised? The explosion was loud. If they did end up with poor hearing they could have joined Charles Hawtrey and the Deaf-Aids.
I didn't trust Dane's wife from the get go. The photo of her on his desk was featured too prominently for her not to be a bad apple. She didn't let me down.
My favorite scene was the one with the suspicious looking guy behind a tree. The actor did an excellent job of looking suspicious while standing behind a tree.
Finally, I have a feeling Dan Clark stood on his fair share of apple boxes during his career.
The Sand Pebbles (1966)
China Crisis
Candice Bergen is sure attractive in The Sand Pebbles. Boy, would I like to get her on a slow boat to China. I wouldn't even mind being in a speedboat to Japan with her. Steve McQueen gets to be in a rowboat with her.
I'm glad she didn't die in the end since pretty much all the other characters did (happily Captain Stubing and Minnesota's James Hong didn't either). The 1960s were great at killing off movie stars in movies. I would have liked to have seen Paul Newman and Robert Redford help McQueen shoot his way out of the Forbidden City at the end even though they all would have died.
I wish more movie stars would get knocked off in movies made today. There are way too many Tom Cruise movies where he is still standing at the end.
I loved Jerry Goldsmith's score for The Sand Pebbles. If I ever got Candice Bergen on a slow boat to China, I'd play it on my boom box.
The Court-Martial of Billy Mitchell (1955)
Malaria In The Court
The son of Alice Cooper plays Billy Mitchell, a career military man, who purposely seeks a court martial in order to bring attention to military air power deficiencies in post Great War America. His defense lawyer is played by a guy who looks a lot like Ralph Bellamy.
The initial prosecuting attorney is played by Fred Clark, who had one of the greatest bald heads in character actor history. When the Army realizes they don't have an open and shut case, they recruit a method actor (Rod Steiger) to win the case.
It's easy to find faults with The Court-Martial Of Billy Mitchell but I found it an engaging film. I kept expecting Agnes Moorehead to show up and turn Jack Lord, who is married to Elizabeth Montgomery in the movie, into a chimp. Sadly, Lord dies in a blimp accident. The good news is that Elizabeth Montgomery looks great in black.
I was wondering: Did the Japanese get wind of Billy Mitchell's prediction that they would bomb Pearl Harbor, and think: "Great idea, we ought to try it sometime!"
Edderkoppen (2000)
Sex, Drugs And Jazz Club
Pretty much knew who was pulling the strings from the get go. Maybe that doesn't matter because according to the string puller, there were others pulling his strings. So our journalist hero did a lot of work for nothing. At least Woodward and Bernstein got a President to resign.
I don't know why Bjarne wanted to get mixed up with the corrupt cop's daughter. She was an actress and, quite frankly, they are often flaky.
The project manager at the office was cute, although I can understand why Bjarne avoided her because she seemed kind of needy.
I liked the scarves in The Spider. The one time I was in Copenhagen it was summer and none of the locals were sporting scarves. This mini series shows that the Danish look rather dashing wearing scarves.