Let’s say one morning on your way to work, your car suddenly stalls in traffic and you can’t start it. Sucks, right? We’ve all driven past (or been) motorists on the side of the road with car problems, and know just how disruptive and exacerbating this can be.
So imagine that your car is dead on the side of the road, and you call for a tow. When the truck arrives, the driver asks what car dealer, auto shop or mechanic you want it transported to. What if you told him to drop it at Covenant Presbyterian Church on 5th and Main so Pastor Mike could pray over it?
That would make no sense, right?
You can’t adjust your home AC temp with a microwave. You shouldn’t get a tattoo from a blind man. Seeking legal advice from the teenage Subway cashier is ill-advised, and Pastor Mike’s prayers is a poor car repair plan.
Religion is Not a Substitute for Mental Health Services
The role of religion in a person’s life may be positive, transformational and liberating. However, it’s a dangerous assumption that religion can serve as a substitute for mental health services.
If your car breaks down, no amount of God, religion or spirituality is going to fix it. That’s not a knock on religion. One’s faith might help bolster a more positive and composed response to any life problem, but it’s still not going to fix your car. It’s a mechanical issue, and responding to the situation as it requires means taking your vehicle to an auto shop for a repair.
Likewise, if you struggle with depression, codependency, addiction, anxiety, eating disorder, or have been affected by trauma or abuse, no amount of God, religion or spirituality is going to magically fix that. I’m not saying these don’t relate. They certainly could. For example, one’s religious devotion or spirituality could re-frame one’s outlook upon their substance addiction, but it would still require the proper treatment plan and personal work (i.e. therapy, 12 Step Program, detox rehab, etc.) to address the root causes and dynamics of an addiction.
Maybe you are reading this and thinking to yourself, “Dah! Of course I wouldn’t take my broken-down car to a religious minister or think I could pray away clinical depression.” That’s a good sign you have not been impacted by toxic religion.
Despite those who would refuse medical treatment for reasons of religious faith, it’s unlikely that even most religious people would depend upon prayer as a viable option for a car repair. But issues associated with one’s inner well-being, peace and happiness, or life choices and behavior, all seemingly relate to this God-religion-spirituality-ish category. Right? In fact, people actually seek religion and spirituality for these very reasons.
But for people raised in a certain kind of religious environment, they likely think of mental health struggles and difficulties in unhealthy ways. I lead a professional training and certification course for those who work with people who have been damaged by toxic religion or suffer from Religious Trauma Syndrome. One of my current students is a professional Psychiatrist, and she is in the process of writing a book that examines the relationship between religion and mental health, particularly the negative impact.
Whether through overt teachings or subtle implications, religion can be damaging to one’s mental health in the following ways:
Failure to understand the biological, psychological and neurological dynamics of the human person, and need for professional mental health treatment or services to address mental disorders.
Being ambivalent, suspicious or outright vilifying psychology, psychiatry and the mental health field, as unnecessary, “carnal”, or antithetical to religious faith.
Implying that proper devotion to God should prevent or resolve mental disorders such as anxiety and depression.
Creating a culture of shame and denial around mental health problems, based upon the spoken or unspoken notion that they are indicators of a lack of faith, spiritual immaturity or disobedience.
Legitimizing the expectation that divine intervention, a miracle, or supernatural forces are reasonable ways of approaching mental health problems.
Viewing pastoral counseling as a preferred or godly way of addressing problems such as anxiety, depression, co-dependency and addiction.
The relationship between religion and mental health has been problematic on many levels. Toxic religion promotes a stigma about mental health struggles and treatment, and tragically teaches that proper relationship with God is the remedy for all inner or mental maladies. It’s unfortunate that many people were taught they could pray or obey their way out of any problem. Needing professional therapy, support, treatment or medication is not a lack of faith or sign of carnality.
One disastrous mental health myth is that personality weakness, character flaws, lack of faith, or deficient relationship with God is the root of mental health struggles. Another myth is that people with mental health problems can snap out of it if they try hard enough. Even some non-religious forms of spirituality imply this. For example, the idea that the practice of meditation or gratitude journaling should dispel unhappiness, anxiety or depression.
The tell-tale sign of religious conversion, true transformation, or spiritual enlightenment, is not the absence of mental health struggles. There are several factors at the root of mental health disorders, which religion is not equipped to adequately address. These factors include:
Biological factors, such as genetics, prenatal damage, exposure to toxins, brain defects or injuries, and neurochemistry
Life experiences, such as trauma, abuse and severe or long-term stress
Family history of mental health disorders
So where did we get this whole idea that religion and spirituality should result in the absence of mental health problems? A few that come to mind are:
Sacred religious texts such as the Torah, Bible, Quran, Bhagavad Gita, etc. predate modern science and psychology, and would not have the knowledge or language associated with the mental health field.
Crafted depictions or narratives about the world’s great religious leaders such as Abraham, Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed, Laozi etc. mostly omit any reference to their mental health struggles, problems and disorders.
Contemporary religious leaders and gurus, as well as popular spiritual figures, teachers, and authors present an air of having it all together and models of personal wholeness.
Misguided religious teachings that mental health difficulties or disorders are the byproduct of humankind’s “original sin” condition, and emblematic of falling short of God’s standard.
When Religion IS the Mental Health Disorder
To make matters worse, religion is often the direct cause of significant mental health problems. Christianity is fond of saying that “the church is a hospital for sinners.” And yet every day I counsel people who became seriously ill through their involvement in religion, and developed faith-related mental health disorders. If truth in advertising standards were applied to religion, it would be mandatory for many churches to display a sign reading: “Warning: this church could be harmful to your spiritual and psychological health.”
There are several ways religion groups can be toxic, including high-control, authoritarian and manipulative church dynamics, and traumatizing messages and teachings that induce fear and shame. This Spiritual Harm and Abuse Scale is often used to access the mental health damage caused by toxic religion.
Religious Trauma Syndrome (RTS), viewed as a type of Complex PTSD, is recognized in psychology and psychotherapy as a set of symptoms, ranging in severity, experienced by those who have participated in or left behind authoritarian, dogmatic, and controlling religious groups and belief systems.
For the past 20 years I have been counseling people who were deeply wounded by toxic religion or have suffered religious trauma. In the process I have referred countless people to non-religious therapists and mental health professionals to assist in this process toward wholeness and well-being. In 2021 I founded the Center for Non-Religious Spirituality to carry this torch forward.
The This-Is-What-I-Am This-Is-What-I-Have Mindset
My fourth book, Notes from (Over) the Edge, includes a section that fleshes out the concept of spirituality in relationship to realities such as depression, codependency, trauma, and abusive relationships. Spirituality is not a substitute for professional therapeutic treatment but a motivation for seeking it without shame or judgment. Seeking professional help is not a detour from your spiritual path; it IS your spiritual path.
In Divine Nobodies there is a chapter in which I share about my journey with depression. Perhaps no chapter in any book I’ve written has resulted in more response. I have a file folder filled with emails from people who wrote me about their own struggle with depression. In many cases the story involved feeling shame at church or given pat spiritual answers on how to remedy it.
Consider the possibility that religion or spirituality is not meant to eliminate or “cure” your depression, but offer a more meaningful and constructive means of relating to it. The change involves a shift from the This-Is-What-I-Am mindset, to This-Is-What-I-Have. Not ‘am’, but ‘have’.
Whether through religion, philosophy, science or spirituality, one could come to an understanding that what we are fundamentally, is inseparable from ultimate reality at the heart of all existence or the ground of all being. That’s what each of us, are.
People often resist and strive to eliminate their depression because they have fundamentally attached their sense of self to it. But rather than thinking of your depression as something you ARE, why not make space for it in your life as something you HAVE.
Consider all the things you have in your life. Look around you right now and notice all you have - a lamp, table, couch, laptop, books, coffee mug, plants, dog, and so on. I think it’s self-evident that you are not your couch or dog, right? You are not your lamp, you have a lamp.
You also experience thoughts, feelings, attitudes, perceptions, sensations, and moods. Throughout your day, these are constantly shifting and changing. But if you think about it, there’s always a you that remains and is always there, even as these thoughts, feelings and sensations come and go. Right? It’s not like when the feeling of annoyance disappears, you disappear with it. There’s a you still there. Annoyance is not what you are, it’s a feeling you have, and then goes away.
This also applies to various physical ailments or conditions a person might have. Perhaps you are nearsighted or farsighted, have asthma or arthritis, or struggle with allergies or acid reflux. Some people are sadly diagnosed with serious illness such as heart disease or cancer. Are these caused by lack of faith or failed relationship with God? Can you pray away, apply a Bible verse or meditate a cure to these health problems?
I’m not unaware of psychosomatic dynamics. Stress, unresolved emotional wounds, dysfunctional relationships, unhealthy coping strategies and destructive lifestyle habits, can all be contributing factors to some physical illness. To whatever extent one’s religion or spirituality enables a person to constructively address these, great! But in my view, it’s harmful to teach or imply that physical or psychological struggles, disorders or illness these can and should be resolved solely through faith and religious devotion.
If you struggle with depression, it’s something else to add to the have list - you have depression.
What does having depression mean?
Does it mean there is something wrong with you? No.
Does it mean you are a failure? No.
Does it mean you don't have enough faith? No.
Does it mean you are not spiritual enough? No.
If you have arthritis, would that mean you are not spiritual enough or not enlightened? Of course not. It’s the same with depression. We only see depression differently because we have created a special category for depression, and falsely imagine it is different. But there really is no difference between arthritis and depression. Neither one are a sign of spiritual immaturity.
The condition of our bodies and minds are as a result of a lifetime of experiences, circumstances and conditions. For some people, that manifests in the form of arthritis. For some people, it manifests in the form of depression.
If you have depression, rather than making it/you bad or wrong and constantly fighting it and striving to fix or eliminate it, consider making a space of acceptance for it in your life. Do not judge it as “good” or “bad” - it just IS. What you are and what you have are two totally different things. What you ARE is complete and whole. What you HAVE is any number of different things, including depression.
Inside that space of acceptance, respond as the situation requires with your depression and let that be your path forward. Perhaps the situation requires that you seek professional support or take medication to manage your depression. Perhaps the situation requires that you make certain lifestyle changes or incorporate a holistic plan for cultivating improved mental health and well-being. Whatever the situation requires to address your depression, do it. That’s your spiritual path. An aspect of your spiritual path is your relationship to your depression.
Transformation is not the ABSENCE of depression, it’s a different relationship WITH your depression. It starts by creating a space of acceptance, and responding as the situation requires. If you slice your hand open, the situation requires you go to the doctor and get stitches. If you have depression, the situation may require you go to a mental health professional and seek support and treatment. There is no difference between going to the doctor for stitches and being on medication for depression. You can’t pray away the sliced hand or depression.
A Few Mental Health Resources
What follows are a few resources you might find useful related to mental health:
The Noonday Demon: An Atlas Of Depression by Andrew Solomon
First, We Make the Beast Beautiful: A New Journey Through Anxiety by Sarah Wilson
Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Kristin Neff
The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk
Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion by Marlene Winell
When Religion Hurts You: Healing from Religious Trauma and the Impact of High-Control Religion by Laura Anderson
Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders: Dsm-5 (PDF)
In Summary
Religion might help a mental health problem, but sometimes IS the mental health problem.
The idea that religion or spirituality should cure mental health disorders only shows that one doesn’t understand religion, spirituality, or mental health disorders.
Doing what the situation requires, including seeking professional help, treatment and support, to address your mental health challenges IS your spiritual path.
My uncle Steve claims that once after repeated attempts to start his car in a Walgreens parking lot, he prayed and it miraculously started. But this is also the uncle who swears he saw Elvis in a bowling alley in Texas.
“Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you.”
- Carl Jung
I remember a church I went to 15 years ago where the pastor told people they shouldn’t be on antidepressants and to rely on God instead. Another church I went to convince me to do healing prayer for my anxiety and then a year later I discovered I was in perimenopause, and I started taking hormones, and the anxiety was gone within a week. The irresponsibility of this kind of behavior cannot be overstated. I’m glad I’m not part of these kinds of communities anymore but I do worry about people who are.
I’ve decided before I accept a diagnosis of depression I need to make I’m not surrounded by a-holes