Getty Images

Common Sex Mistakes Men Make

We've All Made These Mistakes In The Bedroom - How Many Are You Guilty Of?

June 29, 2024

Flip

While most guys would like to believe they’re regular Casanovas in the sack, the truth of the matter is that true sex gods are comparatively rare, and every one of us has made our fair share of mistakes in the bedroom.

(Plus, we were all fumbling virgins at one point, so let’s not all flatter ourselves.)

But there is a bright side to these sexual foibles, as these mishaps are used as learning experiences for better sex in the future.

In case you need a recap of the mistakes you’ve made, or you’re someone who’s never had sex before curious about what could go wrong, here are 10 of the most widespread (but redeemable) mistakes we’ve made in bed — some of which, you’ll realize, happen more than others.

1. Cutting Foreplay Short

In part, perhaps, because it’s called “foreplay,” guys sometimes don’t take non-penetrative stuff seriously. This is a big mistake if you’re looking to properly please a vagina-haver.

Of course it’s understandable to be excited for full-on penetration, but taking the time to make sure your partner is properly in the mood, lubricated and ready to go will make a huge different in quality for both of you.

2. Having a Messy Pubic Situation

Sometimes you know when you’re going to have sex with someone for the first time; sometimes it just kind of comes out of nowhere, like a one-night stand or the unexpected beginning of a friends-with-benefits situation. If you haven’t spent any time preparing your body to be looked upon naked, there’s a decent chance your pubic situation is not ideal, with your wild and untamed pubic hair resembling a wild tumbleweed in a deserted Western town.

On the opposite end of the pubic spectrum, we might have shaved the day before an unexpected dalliance and our pubic area is covered in that itchy, unexpected rash due to both brutish techniques and insufficient tools (because shopping for razors is expensive, so we don’t really do that too much).

3. Getting Too Aggressive

Whether we thrust too hard, say something too vulgar, or use our fingers as if we’re operating a jackhammer, sometimes we can get a little too aggressive in the throes of passion, and need to be told to back the fuck off.

While a little aggression can certainly be appreciated, it’s really something you need a clear and enthusiastic consent for before launching into. (More about that later.)

4. Cumming Early & Then Tapping Out Completely

For a few different reasons, guys sometimes orgasm earlier than they’re expected to. While this might be embarrassing — and even scorned by some less understanding sex partners — if it’s unintentional, it’s understandable, and these things happen.

The real mistake, however, is taking your own climax as a sign that the whole sexual narrative has come to a close. Great lovers know that sex can keep going, and opting for something like face-sitting, fingering or toy use to keep things spicy means you might have a shot at round 2 later on.

5. Facial Hair Irritating Their Skin During Oral

If you’re performing cunnilingus on your partner, your face is getting up close and personal with their crotch. Which, from your perspective, is probably awesome. But if you have a little stubble, it may not be as awesome from your partner’s perspective.

On the other hand, a bushy beard, especially if it’s been well groomed with beard oil, may even be softer. So take your pick: Either clean-shaven or full-bearded. Middle of the road facial hair may produce some serious irritation.

6. Not Douching

This one’s for the gays and bis — as with untamed pubic hair being a consequence of an unexpected hookup, sometimes you’re thrust into a hot situation without having been able to use an anal douche. And sometimes your top comes away from the situation with a little “paint” on them. Not the end of the world — but definitely embarrassing.

7. Putting the Condom on Backwards

Despite being taught this lesson as far back as elementary school, a condom is not easy to put on. You’re almost guaranteed to put the thing on backwards in the first attempt. I’ve never actually gone as far to roll a condom down my shaft backwards, because that would be difficult to do, but I’m sure somebody somewhere has.

RELATED: How to Choose the Best Condoms

8. Accidentally Trying for Anal

If you’re having sex in the dark, you don’t always have a clear sense of where everything is. And, if you’re having sex with someone who has a vagina, well, their anus is usually pretty nearby. So sometimes, in an attempt to get ourselves in there, guys hit that other part of the anatomy that is located rather close to the intended target.

Since condoms don’t come with a GPS, you instead have to feel around as if you’re playing a game of pin the dick on the vagina. If you ever find yourself in a situation such as this, ask your partner for a favor: grab the penis and do the guiding for us, pretty please?.

RELATED: Things Guys Need to Unlearn About Sex

9. Not Talking About Consent

Lots of the time, sex unfurls in a kind of messy fumble and there’s no time or space for talking about or clearly establishing consent beforehand — at least, that’s what many guys think.

The truth is that taking a little bit more time to check in with the other person before trying a new move or position isn’t rocket science, and it’s not a mood-killer — it shows you care about their enjoyment and well-being and aren’t a jerk, which is hot.

10. Getting a Little Too Influenced by Porn

The average guy watches a lot of porn. All of us. And because the average guy didn’t get very comprehensive sex education growing up, sometimes he may attempt difficult positions that look way better than they feel.

This may also lead guys to say things to their partners that they’ve heard in hardcore porn clips — things they shouldn’t say without knowing how said partner will feel about it — turning sex into some strange monologue that has them saying things that ultimately feed their egos, rather than nourishing the shared erotic moment.

Ultimately, none of these mistakes are the end of the world — but now that you’ve been educated, it’s your job to stop making them!

You Might Also Dig:

How To Have Better Sex

Casual Sex

Dating Mistakes

Sexual Confidence